Genuinely enjoyed reading peoples comments, and there’s so much food for thought.
Aquariums had always been an escape that became a little too much of an obsession.
Moving home helped to break that obsession for me, coupled with working so much. It does give me doubts about investing time into it again.
I think what I’m learning from the discussion is perhaps I need to really think about what I want from this aquarium.
There’s so much passion on this forum that often becomes infectious and provides motivation and inspiration but equally creates a desire to want something as equally beautiful as what’s often displayed on here.
This creates conflict between wanting a beautiful tank and wanting to continue the time I’ve had away from it.
It’s almost like I’ve quit cigarettes and have this urge to smoke again but I don’t want to.
😵
Sounds like you’re just an artist feeling what every creative person feels, that frustrating gap between what we want to make in an ideal world and what we actually make in reality. I think that’s why people like contest scape, because they are like a fantasy world, but ultimately those fantasy worlds are created in a snapshot , but a real aquarium isn’t a photograph, it’s not a dead thing it’s a complex living ecosystem. Not to insult those tanks they are beautiful, but they are one style of many and all are equally valid and tbh I think beautiful. You’ve got to give it and yourself some slack! You’re not working in a medium which can be perfected in a human way, and frankly I think that’s what’s great about it!
I went through a similar thing after my big tank went horribly, and tbh again recently when I realised the stickleback tank wasn’t engaging. Luckily my nano tanks are very cute and thriving which helped me realise it’s not me not enjoying the hobby any more, just need to find the right balance of beauty, interesting animal behaviour and maintenance. I don’t think you should give it up, I think that this hobby can be very good for your health unlike the cigs, but it really is about finding the right tank and setup for your life. I know you came from marine so are used to big tanks, but maybe a smaller tank to rekindle the joy might help? Big tanks are WAY more effort, it’s just a fact. I get an enormous amount of joy from small tanks, and 60L on the large side of small is a brilliant size where you can keep a diverse range of fish, a lovely scape and it’s super manageable
I have also tried copying other peoples tanks loads and 75% of the time I just can’t do it as well as they do, or doesn’t look how I wanted it to. It’s the same with plants- I simply can’t grow them all for all sorts of reasons. But tbh as an artist and designer I think that’s always the case with creative pursuits - you copy and do trial and error so that your own natural style emerges, the copy isn’t the end point it’s the beginning. Honestly it’s a really hard process and loads of what we make in doing it will be rubbish , but there will be great parts too which are uniquely you. This is what I love about UKAPS, that in our journals we record our creative journeys and create something uniquely ours, every person takes what they’re interested in and runs with it, the diversity of ideas is fabulous. You can let the process torture you at every imperfect step, or you can enjoy the ride and allow yourself to make mistakes and change direction and experiment to see what happens.
I think a lot of us go through that process. We're initially drawn to the hobby by the pristine look of highly maintained and sculptured tanks, like competition tanks. However they can eventually become a little tiring (both to maintain and to look at) when you own one, and we start to crave something that a little more mystique and intrigue - and the shadowy, minimalist and more naturalistic look of more habitat/biotope style tank can start to appeal more.
It's a bit like visiting a country house - there's only so long you can spend walking around the pristine manicured estate gardens before you get a bit 'saturated', but head for the woodlands and you never tire of what you see.
Sometimes I think its more about what you can't see, discovering hidden things, and the prospect of seeing new things (and new livestock behaviours) which is sometimes more fulfilling than everything presented neatly in your face at 200 PAR. That's why I think sometimes the shadowy and unlit areas, and broken lines of sight, often seen in habitat style tanks create that intrigue and ongoing interest.
I recently set up a new 70 litre quarantine tank (as a result of your recent TB issue). I just put in a layer of silver sand, then a layer of well aged wet oak leaves on top, stuffed in a couple of easily removable pieces of root-like wood, a couple of large hand sized patches of anubias shoved in between the root branches, and some needle java on a small rock with very low lighting - all design to make new livestock comfortable, nothing more - no real thought to aesthetics. It's dark and gloomy at the back, and lit a bit more at the front, with some nice shimmer from the point source light and ripple from the HOB filter. It literally took me about half an hour to put together, and I think it's one of the best tanks I've ever had. I can't stop going into the fish room (aka boiler room) to look at it (and the Tangerine Tiger shrimp that are currently breeding in it), which kind of speaks volumes to me.
Anyway, that's all a bit philosophical for me for a Wednesday afternoon, I think I need a lie down!
Love this exactly! Great to hear you’re doing quarantining properly too got that fabulous big tank of yours. This is the same conclusion I’ve come to for my next tank - simple, easy, bold and perfect for the creatures. For me the thing I love about nature has always been the discovery- looking under a log in the forest, poopeering into the edge of a pond, lifting a large flat rock in a pool at the beach, see what lovely little creatures there are living and thriving in those little niches. That’s what I want to recreate in my tanks! I agree, when humans intervene too much it’s just never as good as what nature can do, that’s why tanks are so great that we get to work together. Luckily this style seems to be the easiest route for maintenance and cheaper to run which helps.😅
I’ve been having a GREAT time collecting twigs recently from all over the place, I really like with this style that there’sa good element of collecting my own materials too rather than buying it all. Feels holistic and right for me!
